Tears
stained the little blue pillow on my couch. The outlines of tears past and
tears present created a jumbled up blob of sad stories.
Some
tears came from grieving with friends who had lost loved ones. Some were cried
out during prayers begging God for the salvation of my lost friends. Many tears
came from being hurt, or facing my own regrets and failures. And some tears came
from nights where my heart felt as if it was being ripped out of my chest from
heartache.
That
little blue pillow has had its fair share of tears. When I’m sad, or afraid, or
just plain bleh, it’s all I can do to squeeze that little blue pillow as tight
as I can and somehow find the ability to release whatever emotion is welling up
inside of me.
Ecclesiastes
says that there is “a time to laugh, and a time to cry.” For most of my life,
I’ve experienced seasons of laughter and joy. But sometimes the Lord allows us
to go through seasons of sadness.
Months
ago, I clung to my little blue pillow as I wept after hearing the news that my
dear friend’s mother had lost a long fight with breast cancer. My heart ached
for her and questions swarmed through my mind. Why, God? How? What now?
I
received a message from another friend who is volunteering in Africa about the
conditions there. Thousands of children roam the streets, begging for money.
Women and infants are dying in labor due to the lack of medical knowledge and
equipment. Again, I wept over the sad conditions that so much of the world
faces every day. Why, God? How? What now?
Recently,
I said goodbye to one of the best friends I’ve ever known and cried and cried
until I woke up the next morning. The loss was too much to bear. Again, I asked
the Lord the same questions. Why? How?
What now?
Though
my questions were unanswered, I knew that God hears the cries of his children
and he won’t turn a deaf ear to them.
Sometimes
we think we must have done something wrong if we are going through a season of
sadness. If we’re following God, we should be happy, right? Or could it be that
the thousands of tears that were spilled onto my little blue pillow could be
watering a seed that will one day turn into a beautiful flower?
Maybe
God allows us to go through trials and hard times, not to punish us, but to
increase our dependence on him and strengthen us. Maybe he burdens our souls in
order to pray for his people and to spur us into action. Maybe if life was all
butterflies and rainbows, we wouldn’t understand our need for Jesus.
Scripture
is filled with God’s promises for the heavy-hearted:
“The
Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves
the crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18
“Cast
your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain
you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22
“And
after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called
you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen,
and establish you.” 1 Peter 5:10
“Those who sow with tears will reap with songs
of joy” Psalm 126:5
“Weeping may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5
Look at
these amazing promises that spring forth after a season of trouble and sadness:
He saves us, He sustains us, He will restore,
confirm, strengthen and establish
us. And we.will.reap.with.JOY!
As I’m
nearing the end of my twenties, I think I have a more realistic view of life. I
recognize that there are many troubles. People will always disappoint and let
you down. The world is filled with evil and horrible things happen. We lose
loved ones. We experience heart-break. But there is no problem that God does
not care about. There is no tear that has stained my little blue pillow that
the Lord has not seen.
He sees
us. He weeps with us. Sadness is a reality; How we respond to it is a choice.
Will you cast your burdens on the Lord? Only He can mend our broken hearts.
