Two
years ago, I packed all of my belongings into my car and began the 3,000 mile
journey from North Carolina to San Francisco. Going to seminary had always been
a dream of mine, but when I crossed the Golden Gate Bridge a week later, my
dream became a reality. I was finally here, a student at Golden Gate Baptist
Theological Seminary. I was nervous and excited, all at the same time. I knew
God had called me here, but I had no idea what to expect.
At
the new student orientation that week, I found myself in a room full of
students just like myself who had answered God’s call to full-time ministry and
decided to come to seminary to be properly trained and equipped. Dr. Iorg stood in front of us and spoke about
the significance of our years at seminary. At that moment, I remember looking
across the room and getting goose bumps. It was amazing to think that each
person in the room had received a specific calling from God and one day we
would be scattered across the world, proclaiming the name of Jesus to those who
need Him. And yet, God had brought us together for this season of our lives, to
learn and grow and become the people that He designed us to be. I felt
completely humbled and unworthy to be a part of such a great mission. I
remember going up to the top of Chapel hill that night and looking out at the
city of San Francisco. I cried out to God to use my short two years of seminary
to draw me closer to Him and to be well-equipped for whatever He had in store
for me.
Two
years later, I can now stand before you and testify that God answered those
prayers. God has used my experience at Golden Gate to draw me closer to Himself
and to equip me for ministry. I’d like to share with you how I have grown
academically and spiritually, and how I have been prepared for ministry.
The
classes I have taken at Golden Gate have stretched my mind and taught me
practical truths that I will carry with me as I enter into full-time ministry.
Academics don’t necessarily come naturally for me, so when I started my first
semester, I was anxious…to say the least. I still remember the utter fear I had
when I was assigned my very first exegesis paper in Dr. Watson’s Old Testament
class. I didn’t know what the word “exegesis” even meant and suddenly I felt
very overwhelmed. I had no idea what I
had gotten myself into and wondered if I was really cut out for this whole
seminary thing. I stood outside of my professor’s office, nearly in tears, when
I ran into Dr. Iorg in the hallway. He encouraged me not to stress over every
assignment, but to just enjoy the process of learning. Once I cut myself some
slack, I began to learn some valuable lessons in my classes. I enjoyed diving
into the Bible in my Old and New Testament classes and then discovering the
core of my beliefs in my Theology classes. My missions and evangelism classes
were some of the most practical for me as I studied different people groups and
how to most effectively share God’s love with them.
But
perhaps just as valuable as the education I received in the classroom were the things
I learned through relationships with my professors and fellow students. There
were many evenings that I would sit in Dr. Prosperly and Patsy’s home, hearing
stories from the mission field in India while sipping on chai tea. I was
captivated by their stories and encouraged by their experiences. I spent my
J-terms traveling with world with Dr. Pate and other professors and students.
My eyes were opened to see the ways God is working in Southeast Asia and the
Middle East. These hands-on experiences taught me more than I ever could have
learned through reading a textbook. God blessed me with supportive professors
and deep friendships on campus. I am so thankful for the community that I have
found here at Golden Gate.
As
I reflect on the spiritual journey I’ve been through in seminary, two main
lessons come to mind. The first lesson God taught me in seminary is to be
deeply invested in the present. It’s easy to look ahead and dream about what
the next phase of life will be like. But God has placed you HERE for this time.
The missionary Jim Elliot once said, “wherever
you are, be all there!” As a planner and a visionary, I often find myself
missing out on the present because I am so future focused. But as I went
through seminary, I felt like God was constantly reminding me to live in the
here and now, always aware of how He is working around me and how I can join
Him. When I finally stopped trying to plan my whole future, God showed me how
He could use me here in Mill Valley, even as I prepared for ministry. I got
connected with international students in the area through Tiburon Baptist
Church and loved serving God in that way.
Perhaps
the most important lesson I’ve learned in seminary is to love God more than
anything. In my very first class in seminary, my professor said something that
has stuck with me ever since. She said, “Often times it’s easy in ministry to
love serving God more than you love Him.” Over the course of the next year,
I found myself falling into that trap. I found satisfaction from doing service
projects and telling other people about Jesus. But I realized that I talked about Him more than I talked to Him. I began to feel very
superficial, like I was preaching something I didn’t actually practice. God
brought me to a breaking point where I was stripped of all of my ministry
titles and everything else that I had used to be my identity. He showed me that
my identity could only be found in HIM. Though this was a painful process, I am
so thankful that I learned this now. I would not be prepared to go into
full-time ministry if God was not the core of my being.
These
spiritual lessons, along with the theological knowledge I’ve gained, have
prepared me for the next step in my journey. This summer, I will move to Hawaii
where I will share Christ with international students at the University of
Hawaii. God gave me a passion for international students many years ago, and He
used my experience at Golden Gate to confirm that call. I am so excited to see
what He has in store!
When
we leave this place today, we will embark on a new phase of our lives. Some of
you will be pastors, some will be missionaries, some will stay in America,
others will take the Gospel to the ends of the earth. Let’s commit today to
being fully present, and to loving Jesus more than anything else. Our seminary
experience has prepared and equipped us for ministry. Now let’s go be the salt
of the earth and the light of the world and fulfill the great commission
together.
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